Real Talk: Self-Worth
This is just my perspective on all of these terrible and blatantly generalized “reblog posts” I’ve been seeing on tumblr (which reminds me, I gotta start unfollowing some people cuz my dash is starting to get whack again)
Situation: When a probably genuinely nice guy sees a reblog or a post about how “all guys have terrible morals, a girl deserves better, yadda yadda yadda”, he might possibly respond with “I would never treat a girl that way, I would give the girl the world, buy her all of her favorite things, cook for her, cut her toenails, and then some. But you girls never see me, you always chase the assholes and I’m left invisible.”
First of all, STOP IT SON.
Don’t just automatically put all your emotions and “things you would do for a girl” out in public like you’re submitting a dating resume. Have a bit of mystery. Your character and charisma will speak for you. If you have a genuinely nice aura, girls notice it. Unless you are trying to court every girl that reblogged the “I hate men” post, you don’t have to constantly prove to these girls who already have a set-opinion with detailed explanations on how you’re unlike the pack and you’d do this and that for a girl.
Second of all, conjure up some self-worth.
You aren’t invisible son. If you are genuinely a good guy, someone has noticed it. Maybe you’re just not looking in the right direction. But please, don’t go for the first girl who gives you the slightest attention. You HAVE to have standards of your own. If you keep thinking that you’re going to treat your next girlfriend like a queen, she’s gotta have queen-like attributes. Don’t waste your best on someone who doesn’t deserve the best. Before you begin to do all the sweet and sensitive things you’ve been dreaming of doing for a girl, make DAMN sure that girl deserves it to begin with.
Lastly, I know because I’ve been there.
I was in such a relationship. I was like a blind and deaf drone, doing everything I said I would do for a girlfriend: The morning texts, the random compliments and sweet nothings, the surprise gifts and flowers, even visiting her when she lived 45 minutes away and I didn’t even have a license. But I didn’t realize she didn’t appreciate it because I was too busy trying to prove I was the perfect gentleman. Then it was all over and I ended up an empty shell. But at least it opened my eyes, and I hope this opens yours.
And to the Ladies: (don’t think I forgot about you)
Don’t fall for a guy just because he thinks he knows what all girls want to hear. Don’t swoon over him because he can think up all of these romantic dates. That shit doesn’t make him a nice guy. I can tell you 100 different romantic gestures, but that doesn’t make me a nice guy. It just makes me creative and attuned to the interests of a woman in a relationship. Fall for a guy who you believe possesses ALL of the qualities you look for. Not just one who can say a bunch of nice things.
Self-worth, my friends.
